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Nightcharm publishes fun topics relative to gay guys: Art, sex, humor, fashion, erotica and spirituality. The site was founded in 1998 by David K. Its current editor is Matt Pizzuti.

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Quel Frottage! A Cock Warrior’s Call To Arms: Naked Men Rubbin’

by Shawn Baker
Frottage Fever

Ay, there’s the rub…

The enigmatic French term for it is Frottage, more colloquially, the dry hump, frotting, bagpiping, scrumping and perrear.

But there’s also: The Safety Dance, grinding, cock2cock, cock knocking, dubbing, sandwich dancing, dogging, the Princeton Rub and cock surfing.

It all comes down to putting your dick anywhere other than the big three orifices.

That’s a continent of erogenous zone to cover.

The Greeks paved the way and all-male college campuses took it and ran with it. It’s a favorite of wrestlers, jockeys, bikers, anyone who’s ever taken an abstinence pledge and straight-identified guys who still like a good man-to-man groin grind. It’s something we’re all into in one style or another. Most likely it’s the first form of sexual stimulation we discovered as children by means of some inanimate object. By the time we’d reach our teens, we’d upgraded to another partner.

The expected dick-on-dick friction standoff is just the tip of the iceberg. Thighs, legs, pecs, biceps, faces, asses and feet are all equally game, the full-on body surf being the pinnacle. It’s probably the most instinctive and intuitive form of sexual intercourse practiced by the most hesitant beginner and the most seasoned veteran either as a form of teasing or as the big show stopper.

Plus, it’s got range: clothes on or clothes off, standing up or laying down, face to face or back to front, sober or blitzed. Some men even do it unconsciously while they sleep.

Ass rubbing (Frottage) Gay

Never center stage in big ticket adult film industry circles because it’s deemed too vanilla (you’re not likely to find Penis Fencing, Oxford-Style! or Pec Fuckers 4: The Grand Canyons on the shelves), cock surfing still turns up even in impromptu or blink-and-you’ll-miss-it cameos in a medium where explicit penetration is compulsory.

Any brand name slice of muscle porn is bound to feature at least a few seconds of some roided-up slab massaging his dick between another guy’s rigid lats, teasing an upturned ass with an engorged glans or cleavage-fucking a genuflecting muscle slut.

Oddly enough, it’s this spontaneous foreplay that often tends to be the steamiest and most rewind-worthy part of the act. Niche-marketed eroto-grappling features devoted to climax wrestling cater to viewers seeking thrills that veer off from the typical ” Oh yeah, man! Fuck my ass!” exchanges.

Be it the specter of HIV or just an antipathy toward standardized sex play, Frot Culture has taken root and become a distinct and iconoclastic stratum of gay life. Known collectively as the Man2Man Alliance, Frot Men have risen up against the so-called “Butt-Fuck Dictatorship” (a term coined in Bill Weintraub’s seminal 2000 Frot manifesto) and champion non-penetrative phallus-to-phallus contact.

Frot Credo stridently deconstructs the Top/Bottom, Active/Passive and Insertion/Reception dichotomies that are viewed as mirrors of heterosexual intercourse; in this ethos, the anus just doesn’t fly as a sexual organ and is not the male equivalent of the vagina. It’s only through mutual and egalitarian dick-dick meeting that the ultimate co-mingling of two partners’ masculinities can be achieved. In Frot World, the buttfuck is merely a parody of straight sex and “gay sex” is not limited to the expected rock ‘em sock ‘em bouts of all anal action your average DVD jacket promises.

Two gay cocks rubbing

The notion’s not without merit and appeal. It’s after all the anus that’s usually the subliminal cynosure of the Religious Right’s condemnation when it comes to same-sex relations. If indeed “a man who lies with a man as with a woman” is truly a transgression, then the cock rub is exempt from the classification; the stimulating of two erect members is an exchange in and of its own right that’s not a simple aping of straight sex.

Frot Rhetoric is not without its troubling aspects either, namely in its tendency to reinforce Fundamentalist preoccupations with our sexual orifices serving only the strictest of biological functions. Just as the vagina must only exist as a birth canal, so to is the back door a No Man’s Land for sexual gratification.

Suspicions that a latent fear of emasculation lurks behind the Frot Coalition aren’t completely unfounded. In one sense, its common themes and allusions to fraternity, innocent horseplay, romance, superheroes and other mythic figures, fidelity, spirituality, male bonding in naturalistic settings, vigor, classical Greek culture and its noble ideas and male primacy (Frot Men will often refer to themselves as “warriors” or “soldiers”) are inviting. In another context, the Alliance’s linkage of anal play with promiscuity, disease and mental illness can be off-putting.

Assertions that there’s an “anal mafia” operating to not only perpetuate a grand-scale lie that anal sex is enjoyable, but also conspiring to discredit Frottage as a sexual disorder come across as deeply paranoid. Hypocritically and condescendingly at times, Man2Man will seek broad-base acceptance and lament its marginalization while hawkishly characterizing anal as nothing more than a vicious means of violating, humiliating and debasing feminized “victims.”

Gay Frottage Article

In this Dude Culture, the Power Bottom, the versatile Role Reverser and the new wave of positionally protean Gay Porn Superstars — not to mention good hygiene and the Male G-spot — are apparently fantastical concepts along the lines of the centaur and the cockatrice.

Whether this all amounts to a ruggedly individualistic Homosex Movement or a closed-off state of macho separatism (maybe more than a dash of both?) could ultimately be a draw. Gays have simply heard too much bombast about what constitutes a “real” man to not be a little bit cynical about an alliance that draws the line between the Man’s Man and the Girly Boy.

Splitting the difference and finding the balanced middle ground is probably the best approach. Strangers With Candy’s picaresque little tramp and up-for-anything good time gal Jerri Blank insouciantly said it best: “I like the pole and the hole.” It’s a compromise the Frot Warriorship seems too unwilling to make.

In the vast ocean of sex, sometimes you ride the wave, sometimes you take the plunge.

©2008 Nightcharm

  • HarryC

    It’s nice to see frottage getting the props it deserves. My boyfriend and I can spend hours grinding, and then take a break and do it some more. It’s like a tantric practice in a lot of ways. I wish your writer had covered the phenomenon of beard frottage…it’s really sexy and fantastic.

  • Sloppy 2nds

    I like rubbing parts as much as the next guy. But the group mentioned are FREAKS. You mention some of their less salient positions. Back when I was looking into them, I choked on the blatant homophobia so badly I got the fuck off their site and if anyone says they subscribe to that crud I give them the kiss off.

    Please, warn folks these guys are the Scientologists of the homo-set.

    Weird, deepy creepy. And the saddest part is, they have a GREAT idea. But it needs to not be some fucked up Religion, complete with persecution fantasies.

  • Marc AZ

    I love the term DEEPY CREEPY. I agree with Sloppy2, it’s too bad there aren’t other options out their for frottage fans…Someone should address this immediately. Maybe the democrats can add it to their burgeoning ‘to do’ list?

  • Hal55

    The hitch is that they aren’t content with having frot just be an alternative or a part of the spectrum. It’s all or nothing and this big value judgment about morality. They can’t seem to imagine that anyone outside of their circle has the mental state or dignity to actually consent to any other form of sex.

    As mentioned above, a good idea marred by very ugly grandstanding.

  • mikr

    yeah seems like the fundamentalist mindset is alive and well in frot land – best to let them rub themselves into oblivion

  • Thorn

    So…do these guys not do fellatio either? If so, that’s mind-bogglingly sad.

  • Sam

    It’s normal sexual behavior, and pretty hot at that. But if there’s a dictatorship, it’s on the part of the man2man alliance, who declare that nothing other than frottage is normal or acceptable. The website is weird, more of an angry manifesto than anything else. It’s pretty homophobic, and it also seems that a convenient use for the organization could be to cover for individuals who want to cheat on their wives and yet not feel gay (thus the “bi” and “straight-identified males”). I could be making some assumptions here, but that’s my take on it. Maybe that’s why there’s stern warnings on their site about “fidelity” too.

    In my opinion, the straight-identified male who asserts his right to romps in the sack with other males while at the same time enjoying the priviledges of straight public life, seems to be unfairly having his cake and eat it too. To this group, if they are masculine enough, and worship and love only pure masculinity, and avoid the anus, how could they be gay, after all? I think it’s a check they can’t cash.

  • Gilbert

    These guys obviously have never had a good and truly satisfying dick in the ass. What a pity. It takes a real man can enjoy a really good fuck.

  • Gry

    One of their main beefs is with the Psychological Community, not the gay one, though they’re intent on directing their resentment our way. Psychology has been notoriously slow on the uptake when it comes to realizing that kinkier sex is not always a mental problem or a sex crime, but now they’ve finally started demarcating between healthy frottage (the consensual kind) and the sort committed against an unwilling partner. It’s like Man2Man is throwing punches in the air when the issue lies inward. Too much manly rhetoric can be an indicator of problems behind the scenes.

  • Ethan

    Come on! Saying things like that they (Man 2 Man) just need a “dick in their ass” are the truly homophobic comments here. Comments like that denigrate the fantastic complexity of male/male sexuality, reducing it to a neatly defined and controlled thing with no room for personal preference or choice. That’s the type of attitude that fuels and justifies the paranoia of the Man 2 Man frot community.
    I think that while M2M has a good idea, their methods are screwed up. They maintain that there is a Cultural “dictatorship,” but then too often direct their attacks at other gays (who, maybe not having as much insight, are more accepting of the cultural importance placed on anal).
    Finally, how can you call them homophobic?? They aren’t against gays/gay sex…their website promotes and praises it! Are you saying that being gay equals being promiscuous, effeminate, and a butfucker, and nothing else??

  • http://none Tom

    This Man2Man site is way too bombastic/political/paranoid. Some of their ideas are great: gay men do need to get into fidelity more, have more variety and real creativity in our sexual practices and not be so insistent in anal sex as the be all and end all. It is a shame that the creativity and power of Man2Man’s message is so weakened by the presentation, rigidity and downright paranoia of some of their ideas.

    Their idea of butt-fucking as automatically classifiable as feminine behavior is too old-fashioned, rigid, and medieval in attitude. A man that takes a dick up his ass can be just as masculine as anyone else. Also, you just cannot take the instinct out of a man to stick his dick in something cave-like and ejaculate into it. How can you possibly give up the desire to stick your dick into something that covers every square inch of it completely, giving maximum pleasure to maximum area and the proceeding to dump a nice cum-load into it? Who doesn’t want that? Well … obviously them … but whatever … Men don’t have a vagina, so if you don’t like women, you’ve gotta resort to the rectum/anus.

    Also, shit may be dirty and carry pretty bad diseases that are hard to cure, but shit is part of life. As the title of the children’s book says “Everybody Poops.” (In all seriousness, just in case you didn’t know, there is a book by that title.) As far as STD’s go, anal may be the easiest way to transmit in general, but, herpes and gonorrhea are pretty easily transmitted orally. Taking away anal is not going to eliminate those other risks.

    I agree totally with Shaun’s comment that frequently the best part of scenes in porn are the frottage parts. Personally, I love to rub my dick in my well-muscled man’s “pec cleavage”. I also love, love, LOVE to rub my lips over beard stubble that’s grown in at the end of the day or if he hasn’t shaved in a day. It really turns me on. I love the light burn, the feeling of touching with such a sensitive and intimate part of me something that’s really part of the essence of a man’s masculinity. So even with my defense of anal sex above, I too love frottage. And I really do not want to be excluded just because I like butt-fucking, too.

  • nigel

    Not all us frot guys are bashers of anal sex.
    Some of us can bend a little with understanding and reasoning.
    I love to feel a man against me with his cock against mine or against my butt crack.
    I discovered frottage at an early age, and yes I too went onto different things,ie women and marriage.ButI soon came to the realization that I love men and that I am Gay.It took me several years but I did find out what I was doing as a kid,it was called ( FROTTAGE ).I have never done anal ,but I will not condem it.I enjoy everything else that is associated with love making.And I have met several men that is associated with other Frot groups,that enjoy the same things that I do and they don,t condem or bad mouth those that prefer anal.I have had a friend that is into anal,who tried frot with me and thoroughly enjoyed it, but he wanted both anal and frot.

    Thanks for the story.

  • Arron

    I love the idea of sex with a male and i have a girlfriend who im very happy with. I’m only 18 so i guess i have a lot of things to find out in life before i decide on settling down. i would say im bi-curious and have a friend whose a homosexual who has on a number of occastions before i found a female partner asked if i wanted to try anal sex, but i dont know. When my gf and i go to university and we seperate i think i will want to try all the things that sit at the back of my mind. You know how good it feels to just say it to people you dont know.

  • Marcus

    Sex will always be partially influenced by culture, and there will always be men who don’t want to do anal and oral. So get used to the Frot Men. Frot (penile-penile sex) has always been a part of male-male sex, even in other species.
    Yet to direct the subject to another consideration, the modern truth is that “straight-identified guys” often proposition or suggest ‘gay’ guys to do oral and sometimes even anal, so the problem of an obsession with meaningless sex and an exaggerated fixation on the ‘insertive/receptive’ dichotomy is really not just a “gay issue”, since there are “straight-identified” men who are afraid to walk in front of men who are considered ‘gay’ or ‘effeminate’. What they don’t know is that one of the guys they are scared to walk in front of is anally- and orally-receptive, and that the other guy never even had sex with anyone and hopes to one day have a frot relationship with another guy.
    How many ‘homophobic’ “straight” men have secret sexual lives with men? How many ‘homophobic’ “straight” women have secret sexual lives with women? These are important questions. I think that if you’re ‘bisexual’ it’s better to be honest about it, yet a lot of these men love women equally. Yet deception kills love, so honesty is better. And monogamous frot (and frottage) is safer and healthier than any form of promiscuity.
    And it’s probably fairly difficult to rape a man through frot, since both men have erections. Most men into Frot are into consensual sex, not rape or rubbing against, fondling, or touching someone against their will. That they like (consensual) fighting, wrestling, and martial arts has nothing to do with rape, since men and women also wrestle each other, as do women with other women. The juxtaposition of natural aggression and sexuality is nothing new, regardless of gender-pairing. And of course there is a huge distinction between Frot (or mutual genital-genital rubbing) and the paraphilia of frotteurism, which doesn’t even have to be ‘gay’. Females are the most common victims of frotteurism.
    And if the Man2ManAlliance are the Scientologists of the homo-set, who are the Jehovah’s Witnesses? To be honest these analogies are useless, and simply perpetuate scapegoating and insular defensive myopia. Is there really a fear among the leaders and confident exponents of the Man2ManAlliance site? Strong men who can defend themselves (from potential rapists among other things), who are not afraid to stand up for their beliefs and challenge the man-hating hypocritical religious right, and the hypocritical man-hating and narcissistic secularist left. Do you really think the Democrats and the government are going to fight for your right to Frot? Or will they simply ignore you? Tell me who really supports your freedom.
    Many men who want to be with another man would rather not identify as “gay” because they don’t want to be pushed into doing anal, being promiscuous, and effeminate. I’m not saying I’d necessarily agree with all of them, particularly if they want to present a ‘homophobic’ exterior to hide their same-sex feelings. Yet most Men into Frot are not ‘homophobes’. Nor are they concealing a secret life of frotteurist rape, which has nothing to do with Frot (or penile-penile sex).
    “It’s like Man2Man is throwing punches in the air when the issue lies inward. Too much manly rhetoric can be an indicator of problems behind the scenes.” Looks like the sterile speculation of a superficially educated person. Really, it makes me smile.
    The Man2ManAlliance doesn’t want to take anal away from you. They simply don’t want anal for themselves. It’s their right to choose what they want for themselves, as it is yours. Remember anal and oral cancer can also be consequences of anal and oral. And who wants to contract Hepatitis C or HIV from one experience of being anally-receptive. Is it worth it? Do condoms always suffice? Who in their right mind wants to get these diseases that are preventable? I think it’s an insult to those who couldn’t prevent the diseases or conditions they have or were born with. We have to start being more responsible for our actions, ourselves, and others.

  • Anonymous

    That frottage site is worrying, there is an account of a boy doing judo and rubbing himself off against other boys in his class. Its sexual assault and wrong

  • Alex

    All your pictures show white men only. Is this your way of saying non-whites are
    unwelcome to your site?

  • AJ

    There are lots of intelligent replies to this. I appreciate seeing all of the interest in the subject. I’ve only had a brief frottage experience, and two brief oral experiences… and I’ve realized that frot is all I want to do. The anus, for me, is too much work to deal with and is not pleasurable enough. Though, I will not demoralize anyone else for the kind of sexual deeds they wish to engage in. I personally feel like I could only get off on masculine dick to dick jerking off.

  • Anonymous

    “All your pictures show white men only. Is this your way of saying non-whites are
    unwelcome to your site?”

    Here is a link to the Musings of a Black Gay Man page on the Man2ManAlliance.org website: (link)

    The Man2ManAlliance accepts people of all races and ethnicities, and is not bigoted and prejudicial. We believe that Frot (or Cock2Cock) is the way for ALL Men that want to be the lover of a fellow Man who is treated as an equal, and cherished more than (just) a best friend.

  • David D. Davidson

    I like dick. And I like rubbing other dicks with my dick. I also like the nice sensual nights alone with my Man, and the tri-touches are super gay and that’s awesome. I’m gay.

  • Marc

    We need to have more gay men condemning anal sex. Bill Weintraub is a hero and has done more for gay liberation than any other gay man. It’s about time someone speak out again an act so dirty and disgusting that it’s killed millions of men worldwide. Yes, millions of men have died from AIDS because they had anal sex. They didn’t get it from frot and less than 8% of them got it from oral sex. And now with so many AIDS meds out there we have young guys barebacking who weren’t even alive when the epidemic started. It’s just crazy. Frot is hot, anal is crap….literally!

  • Anonymous

    “Finally, how can you call them homophobic?? They aren’t against gays/gay sex…their website promotes and praises it! Are you saying that being gay equals being promiscuous, effeminate, and a butfucker, and nothing else??”

    Oh, ‘Ethan’ you just don’t get it. They’re saying unless you do -insert bullshit stereotypes here- you’re not a man. I’m sure they also would be the type of people who would beat their wives, because being a man means being above women. That’s why they’re against anal, since it ‘feminizes’ “men”. And god forbid a man be considered feminine.

    Fail. There’s nothing wrong with safe anal sex. Morally perhaps, but morals are all subjective and typically bias because of religion.

  • Infinite A+

    Ok people, look…

    There’s no pleasure in anal sex and I really don’t see how that makes a gay guy truly a man. That’s why the majority of the population out there hates “faggots”; because they plow into butts and pull a lot of crap out. It’s very vulgar and any high school kid would get beaten up for saying that they’re gay. Also, butt plowing is not mutual. It’s not spiritual and there’s no intimate connection in comparison to husband and wife.

    So when a gay guy chooses not to have anal sex, respect him for that. He cares about his own body (and his partner’s), and that makes him smarter and wiser than the rest of the gay community on a whole. Plus, what’s the sense of getting your butt plowed when the tissue and fibers will tear apart, or your rectum is ruptured? And your anus bleeds a lot? Hepatitis C anyone? That does not make you a man, let alone a real one.

  • xtiaan

    I find it sad that man 2 man sexuality is being forced into an either/or position.
    Ridiculous statements such as infinite A+’s observation that “There’s no pleasure in anal sex” (which is why its been done since men had dicks and assholes to put em in, we are talking thousands of years, to say nothing of the straight community who have been doing it just as long, thats a practice that has lasted a long time considering it has “no pleasure”) and similar notions that it makes men effiminate do nothing to serve gay men as a whole. And what is wrong with being effiminate? Some of my best friends are women (to borrow a cliche). I checked out the frot site and it seemed to be suffering alot of internalised homophobia. Why cant two consenting adults do whatever the fuck they want, or dont want, in their bedroom? this further marginalisation that we as gay men are inflicting on ourselves by divisive self labelling does nothing to help our cause.
    Id be happy to frot with a guy who was just into that, just as Im happy to fuck a guy up the ass who wants to get fucked, as i am equally happy to get fucked myself when i feel like it.
    Sex has been stigmatized enough, gay men have been hurt enough, we dont need to keep on doing this to ourselves.

    As for those “straight men” who are into frot (with other men), that just makes me laugh, they may be “soldiers and warriors”, but they cant even accept the notion that they like cock and are therefore at least bi, strength is about more than how big your muscles are, or being a black belt in macrame, it about mental strength, being strong enough to be honest with yourself and live your life that way, to love who you love without shame or fear

    that is what being a man is all about.

    xtiaan day
    new zealand

  • xtiaan

    oh ps as for infiniteA+ “Plus, what’s the sense of getting your butt plowed when the tissue and fibers will tear apart, or your rectum is ruptured? And your anus bleeds a lot? ” remark, what a load of crap, no pun intented.

    the male penis is just as “dirty” as his ass, speaking in a bacteria count fashion.
    if you use condoms tranmission rates lower significantly.

    COCK TO COCK CAN SPREAD SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES
    COCK TO COCK CAN SPREAD SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES
    COCK TO COCK CAN SPREAD SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES
    COCK TO COCK CAN SPREAD SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES

    sorry for the repetition but they make it sound like they have found the risk free holy grail of homosex, and they HAVENT

    The only risk-free sex is NO sex, (or some kinda Im wearing a wetsuit, b+d over the phone type deal)and thats just not good sex is it? (well not for me, I find sex is better with another person in the room)

    if anal sex hurts you arent doing it right. My ass has never bled alot.
    and no an anus is not a vagina, its not designed to have a baby pass through it, consequently its smaller and tighter and a few degrees warmer than a womans snatch. Yes you need lube, but so do most women. Not that Im down on the va-jayjay, what ever floats your boat, Im just pointing out that yes, they are different. And unless you have some kind of gastric disorder they are not “full of shit”.

    Also the head(glans) of the penis is prone to microscopic tears and ruptures. this is how insertive anal sex partners get aids, its also how cock to cock can still spread STDs

    These people just sound like the christian fundamentalist of the sex brigade, and possibly just as dangerous.

    do what you want with whoever you want (as long as they want you to), what could be better than that? just love each other…

    xtiaan

  • jay

    niggers spread disease

  • dickondick

    i had my first experience of cock rubbing when i was in school and have continued to do it. I love the eye contact and the display of eachothers eagerness to cum.

  • tom

    i wish someone would do that with me that looks wicked cool keep up the good work

  • Gary

    To the guy who says cock2cock can cause STDs: I work in the sex health field and the only things that can be spread by this are crabs and possibly MRSA. There have been no confirmed cases of MRSA spread this way but it is considered possible. Herpes, HIV, syphilis, chlamydia, gonorrhea and other common bacterial and viral STDs can NOT be passed this way.

  • john

    fuck me

  • Bob500

    Any one wanna have a good time then text me 4084574303

  • Infinite A+

    Well, as I’ve said before, there’s no need for sexual promiscuity – and that’s found everywhere (especially in the gay community). So of course there’s loads of STD’s going around because people still choose to get involved in such acts. So thanks to them, STD’s will always run rampant and kill many.

    This might be the reason why this article was written – to give many gay men an alternative. I don’t consider it safe anyhow.

  • osvaldo

    oi gostei muito desses fotos sou gay queria este cassete no meu cuzinho virgem

  • Fintan

    I do not condemn those who engage in anal or fellatio. If they enjoy it, fine, but I guess it just isn’t for me. However, as a straight married man, I love wearing panties and seeing other men in sexy ones. I have had a few “panty parties” with other “straight” men of a like mind and the last one was especially enjoyable. We were both wearing sexy white lacy knickers belonging to his wife and got such huge erections that they stuck up above the waistband. Suddenly we were holding each other in a close embrace and rubbing our cocks together, also feeling each other’s cocks and balls with our hands. It was the biggest thrill of my life when we both gushed sperm in massive spasms and I felt the warmth of his sperm on my abdomen and balls at the same time as I squirted all over him. I’d recommend it to anyone.

  • Richard

    To Gary “To the guy who says cock2cock can cause STDs: I work in the sex health field and the only things that can be spread by this are crabs and possibly MRSA. There have been no confirmed cases of MRSA spread this way but it is considered possible. Herpes, HIV, syphilis, chlamydia, gonorrhea and other common bacterial and viral STDs can NOT be passed this way.”

    you obviously don’t know much about the field u work in, while it lowers the risk of infection, stds can still be spread through cock2cock rubbing. Herpes is a skin to skin virus

  • http://non peter

    i really want to try it but i am still in the closet. i always fantasize having it with another man although i think i am bisexual. however even if i want to try it i dont know how to to go abut having a partner because i dont any gay person or is it that everybody hides his true identity?

  • Greg

    I love to rub cock to cock, started in junior high, even though we didn’t know the name we rubbed on each other everyday. got even better when we both started shooting cum, it would mix between our smooth bodies. We even had a secret cave area and a mattress in it so we could hump the mattress and each other to orgasm. We both masturbated by humping, and got into tight white briefs and white panties doing it too. nothing felt better than by friend’s smooth body on mine as we rubbed to orgasm. I have been married and now a grand parent. But I still from time to time enjoy frotting to orgasm with another guy. 18 or older that is. I introduced it to a 19 yr old teen he loved it, we rub lots and I love feeling his cock rubbing on my stomach or crack till he cums forcefully. He too is a bed humper seems strange? how many guys first masturbated to orgasm rubbing against the bed or pillow? Keep rubbing dudes!

  • Rainer

    Seeing quite a lot of ignorance in here, I’m guessing the lovers of anal sex feel somewhat threatened by those who like frot.. Allow me to share my experiences with it, what I’ve studied, and my views of male male relationships based on both.

    Always loved warrior culture, mythology, and history even still today at 26. I noticed the love these men, these warriors would share with each other. Affectionate, loving, and intimate. Much different from the way a man is with a woman.. Not better but different. I thought it was beautiful, noble, awesome, and how a man should be with another man if they were in love.

    I’ve read about the whole “Right of passage” activity that would go on between a young Greek boy, and an older Greek male… This to me looked like Pedophilia, it began to look like it as I got older. It mirrored very much the way pedophiles even today behave, treat, and view the young boys they prey on… Basically it looked like an ancient time NAMBLA. One of the philosophers I cannot exactly remember the one at the moment, Socrates or Aristotle… Were exiled for having done this to so many boys (Penetrating them).. I learned why the Spartans made fun of the Athenians who practiced this “Right of passage”.. They viewed it as “femininzing” young boys.

    The Spartans were in no way homophobic, as they viewed the male body as beautiful too. In fact it was the Spartans who came up with having the Pankration fighters perform nude so that their bodies could be seen. They also believed in the male male love as it made a stronger fighter on the battlefield (which is extremely true). The young boys who’d be sent to the training camps, at the age of 7. Would form a bond with another one of the boys there, and grow together.. The older men would not touch them. I don’t remember the Greek term for it, but the translation was “Joining of the genitals” AKA frot as we call it today.. Its not something they were forced to do, it just happened as the bond between the two males grew.

    To men like this, and not relegated to the Greeks, and Romans but you see this very same thing in ALL cultures. Anal sex was seen as something one of lower status had done to them. A woman, a slave, a conquered foe for humiliation.. Absolutely never two men who saw each other as equals, and celebrated their masculinity. When I think of anal sex, I don’t think of gay sex. Men did anal sex to women to keep her from becoming pregnant, men today still do anal sex to women and their are women who like it. Sometimes a conquered foe would be penetrated, out of humiliation. Raping a man, penetrating him like a female taking his masculinity away from him messes with his head big time… I’ve seen guys go through this, and rape is horrible no matter who it is done to however men seem to suffer far more than women when done to them.

    Men also penetrated slave boys, if they were attracted to men exlusively, although that one male he adored and viewed his equal he would not.. Enter Alexander, and Hephaestion

    No doubt were these two gay, as the only time they’ve been with women were to carry on their line. Alexander even encouraged his men to mix with the people of the lands they’d conquer. Both men had many slave boys in their beds and penetrated them.. Though they never penetrated each other because they saw each other as equals, and the biggest evidence of this is shown when they meet the female leadership of Babylon. She mistakes Hephaestion for Alexander, because Hephaestion looks more important, more imposing than Alexander, as he is a larger man. When she realizes the mistake, she apologizes but Alexander assures her that no harm was done, and that Hephaestion is also Alexander. The two of them definitely did frot, and probably even intercrural… Though never Penetration, unless a slave boy, or a woman.

    Also in the Hellenistic era, where men began to notice more the beauty of women setting the standards of what a woman should be like.. They also did this for the men. The ideal male became a man “without holes”, so he was not to be penetrated.

    Now in my own experience.. I never felt sexually attracted to men, but I became quite close with a guy I served with. It started out as friendship, turned into a brotherly love kind of thing we started becoming more affectionate with each other. It didn’t feel weird, nor did him or I feel as if we were gay. The behavior him and I displayed in front of people seemed normal to everyone.. In the military our behavior wasn’t seen as abnormal to anyone.. On our fight team the same people got it although they threw little “Bromance” or “Man Crush” jokes around the funniest being “Bromeo and Dudeliette” or Alpha and Beta dude. Still I never thought about anything sexual with him nor he with me. We were just really in love with the bond that had grown between us and became bigger with all we’ve been through and how we view each other.. Men, best friends, brothers, equals, fighters, warriors.

    He too has a love for the warrior culture, and history. As this relationship between us became bigger, we both really began to understand why they put such importance on them in ancient times… All cultures not just Greece and Rome (those those are the best examples). He’s got a girl, as do I, our relationship with our women is much different. I do not ever want him trying to emulate a female, nor will I do the same for him in any kind of way we’re men. Both of our women get our relationship and do not feel threatened by it. No matter how much you love women, or the woman you are with. A woman will never understand you as a man the way another man will. They both know him and I have no desire to run off leaving them, they also know they won’t walk in the door and catch us screwing each other.

    Him and I were sexually intimate for the first time, in 2006. It was after a tournament we had won which had us both very hyped up and excited. Long story short it was the frottage we started doing. What I was doing with him felt extremely different from what we had done with our girls earlier that night.. Not better just different in great ways. It felt really good having my body against his body, my penis against his, our sweat mixing together his scent with mine. It felt like we were sharing and celebrating our masculinity and victory. It also made us closer, it made us feel stronger. The extremely high admiration and respect we have for each other as men, best friends, brothers, fighters, soldiers most of all EQUALS, grew… None of these feelings would have happened if he flipped me over and wanted to penetrate me.

    I’m quite sure it would feel good, physically.. Though emotionally/mentally it would have felt very very uncomfortable and not so great to guys like us.. I view anal sex even if its with a chick, as something degrading, and disgusting.. I don’t however feel those who practice should be punished or anything, those are just my feelings of anal sex in general..I also know not all gay men enjoy anal sex.

    To me, none of it has to do with sexuality. People label and limit themselves far too much today. Though I’ve never desired to be sexual with a man in any way nor him. What we do, how we feel for each other doesn’t feel weird to us nor are we ashamed of it in any kind of way or hide it.. It feels normal (We’re not out in public frotting or anything HAHA). It is very normal for men to be affectionate, loving, and even intimate with a man he is most close to, there is nothing “gay” about it. Though with society today many men are afraid to express these emotions with another man, because some fear being hit with the gay label, and with the gay label goes a bunch of other things they do not want to be seen as. Men like my buddy and I could care less of what society says today.

    Yes I am still close with my friend. He is married has a son as I am married and have kids. I named my son after him he named his after me like we promised we would. Our relationship is no different except the fact we’re both fathers now. Though we have our time together or “man time” as my wife and his call it. For those of you who enjoy the anal sex, don’t worry do your thing.

    For this kind of relationship, you do not need to be a fighter, or soldier.. That is just part of what made the bond between him and I stronger as we both went through or go through that stuff together. The relationship is all about 2 men, and 2 men ONLY who are loyal to each other, and have high respect and admiration for each other and deep love as men, equals, friends, and brothers.. Don’t try to treat the relationship the way you would a woman, or each other.

  • glen

    When I was younger I had a play fight with my mate at my mum and dads. He was staying the night. We had raided the drinks cabinet, only in our pants because it was red hot. We ended up naked rubbing our cocks together. Never done it since, but it still turns me on, when I think about how it felt and looked.

  • loveAbs

    i love to rub my cock on a guys flexed or unflexed abs or when he has his stomach cucked in deeply. its one of my favorite ways to nut

  • curiousfeeling

    Glen, I did something very similar.A little to similar, infact.I wonder?

  • kodiak

    just the other day, i was playing with this guy’s ass. he really wanted to be fucked. it had been awhile for him, but after
    a great rimming sesh, and some finger fucking, i teased my cock in(safe). i started nice and easy, then after a while-just pounded away. he was in ecstasy and came all over the place without touching himself. i pulled out, rubber off, and fucked the crack in his ass and ended up shooting all over his back. wow. that was a great fuck!!

  • http://none Manny Espinola

    Sheeesh, this makes me blush a bit. Frottage and me go waaay back. As in ten years old! By 12 I’ve moved on. I mean, dude, it takes FOREVER to come for 2 dicks rubbing each other. Anyone could walk in on us any second and that’s the end of good times. I suppose in a more relaxed setting and with someone who’s really hot and who’s got the hots for you, too, it could be magic. I just got so addicted to those intense, explosive, anonymous 3-minute quickies, y’ know? For deep, soul-penetrating gay sex between equals, nothing beats a 2-hour slow burn tryst that starts with frottage and ends with a simultaneous throat-to-throat ejaculative 69.

  • nikko

    Sorry, RAINER, but just frot alone is boring to me. Anal sex to me is manly and hot. Many men get their strongest orgasms through anal play.Of coruse, I condemn unsafe, promiscous anal. I am aware of the dangers if not done properly, but man anus to me is hot, provided it’s clean, shaved and protected with condom

  • Nat

    Jesus. I’m not shooting the message, but the messengers, with their presuppositions about anal sex, deserve nothing by scorn.

    Let’s address the obvious first – gay sex involves 2 (or more) men. There’s nothing inherently ‘feminine’ in that equation.

    And so what if one partner gets penetrated? The penetrated partner generally isn’t thinking ‘oh, I wish I didn’t have a dick, I’d much prefer to have a vagina!’ Having a dick’s awesome. And wanting to take another dick up the ass doesn’t make me feminine – it makes me appreciate the unabashed masculinity that is the erect penis and the accompanying male body. And wanting to fuck another guy’s ass isn’t about ‘feminizing’ him – it’s about making a man take my dick while I get to play with his.

    No, anal sex is about the convergence of masculinity, the clash of male bodies against each other. It can be tender lovemaking or it can be hard and rough – (incidentally something most women won’t tolerate; I never fucked a woman the way a man likes to get fucked).

  • Klarth

    @Rainier why wouldn’t people in support of anal sex take offense when proponents NOT of frottage in general, but of this specific worldview Man2Man and its supporters, villify anal sex and its participants.

    The majority of pro-anal posters seem to be saying frot is fine, but they aren’t giving up anal when they’re in the mood for it.
    This seems fair to me. No one is making you do anal if you don’t want to, so this group shouldn’t be trying to make other stop.

    All this talk of promiscuity and what spreads diseases most easily and what organs and orifices were designed for which duties is irrelevant. We are all adults here (since this is an 18+ site ;-) and can make our own decisions about what sex acts we choose to participate in. Man2Man shouldn’t be doing any more than spreading the word that people who aren’t interested in or comfortable with anal or oral sex have an alternative for sexual contact, and supporting a community of likeminded people for other frotteurs to interact.

    I think a line is crossed when things like “feminization” and promiscuity and idealized visions of manhood enter the conversation.

  • nikko

    But dear KLARTH, diseases are a dead serious matter. Always. It doesn’t give people the right to do as they please and the hell with the consequences.

  • Rainer

    @Nikko

    Sorry buddy, there is nothing manly about anal sex to me. I look at the guy doing the act (the top), basically treating the other guy (the bottom) as a female- basically trying to emulate heterosexual sex, by one being the girl and the other the man. I’ve had crazy strong orgasms with frot, physically feels amazing- not but then emotionally and mentally it also feels amazing. Every time my buddy and I do it, it always feels better but at the same time like the first time- and ESPECIALLY after we do something great, like if him or I won a fight of ours. I think anal sex is gross, but I understand a lot of gay men are stuck thinking its what you have to do and be if you’re gay. Of course I wish no ill will towards those who do anal, but again its just gross to me.

  • Rainer

    @Klarth

    You can have all the anal sex you please my friend, that is not going to stop me from thinking its gross, dangerous, and I’m sorry just not very masculine. Like I said, I greatly admire the way men who loved each other in ancient times treated each other. Not just emotionally but physically/sexually. They both saw each other as equals, and didn’t try to emulate something they’d do with a woman, with one being the “top” and the other the “bottom” one being penetrated, and the other the one getting penetrated.

    Anal sex among men is not a new thing, but it sure as hell wasn’t smiled upon or seen as ok to be doing to men like people of today who don’t really know history too well think. It aint the way they portray it in the media lol.

    I’ve always thought and felt that there was nothing abnormal, wrong, or anything to be ashamed of, for being in love with another man… In fact my relationship with my guy the way we treat it because of what we admire so much- makes us feel like stronger men- I do however think its a bit weird seeing two men trying to emulate the actions of a man and a woman.. BUT again in no way do I think those type of people should be denied, hurt, or whatever.. Its just odd to me.

  • Reggie

    To the person complaining that all the pics are of white guys. It goes a bit of the way towards levelling things up…in UK we have a BLACK POLICE OFFICERS FEDERATION but are not allowed to have a WHITE POLICE OFFICERS FEDERATION because that is considered racist…Here white people are now treated as second class citizens in their own country and must NEVER criticise people of any other ethnicity even though statistics show that most crime is committed by them.

  • ralph

    I’ve had frottage sex with another man a few times and it was great. It really is a matter of choice. I wish we could all get past our phobias and just accept the fact that there are different strokes for different oakes. The rhetoric and arguments for or against specific ways of enjoying another man is so incredibly boring! Frottage is great, sucking is great, but being sucked is a better experience to me. I’ve tried anal once, weren’t too keen on it, but think it might be better next time around, if I care to try it. Hope you all have fun and that your partner agrees.