Quel Frottage! A Cock Warrior's Call To Arms: Naked Men Rubbin'

Frottage Fever

Ay, there's the rub...

The enigmatic French term for it is Frottage, more colloquially, the dry hump, frotting, bagpiping, scrumping and perrear.

But there's also: The Safety Dance, grinding, cock2cock, cock knocking, dubbing, sandwich dancing, dogging, the Princeton Rub and cock surfing.

It all comes down to putting your dick anywhere other than the big three orifices.

That's a continent of erogenous zone to cover.

The Greeks paved the way and all-male college campuses took it and ran with it. It's a favorite of wrestlers, jockeys, bikers, anyone who's ever taken an abstinence pledge and straight-identified guys who still like a good man-to-man groin grind. It's something we're all into in one style or another. Most likely it's the first form of sexual stimulation we discovered as children by means of some inanimate object. By the time we'd reach our teens, we'd upgraded to another partner.

The expected dick-on-dick friction standoff is just the tip of the iceberg. Thighs, legs, pecs, biceps, faces, asses and feet are all equally game, the full-on body surf being the pinnacle. It's probably the most instinctive and intuitive form of sexual intercourse practiced by the most hesitant beginner and the most seasoned veteran either as a form of teasing or as the big show stopper.

Plus, it's got range: clothes on or clothes off, standing up or laying down, face to face or back to front, sober or blitzed. Some men even do it unconsciously while they sleep.

Ass rubbing (Frottage) Gay

Never center stage in big ticket adult film industry circles because it's deemed too vanilla (you're not likely to find Penis Fencing, Oxford-Style! or Pec Fuckers 4: The Grand Canyons on the shelves), cock surfing still turns up even in impromptu or blink-and-you'll-miss-it cameos in a medium where explicit penetration is compulsory.

Any brand name slice of muscle porn is bound to feature at least a few seconds of some roided-up slab massaging his dick between another guy's rigid lats, teasing an upturned ass with an engorged glans or cleavage-fucking a genuflecting muscle slut.

Oddly enough, it's this spontaneous foreplay that often tends to be the steamiest and most rewind-worthy part of the act. Niche-marketed eroto-grappling features devoted to climax wrestling cater to viewers seeking thrills that veer off from the typical " Oh yeah, man! Fuck my ass!" exchanges.

Be it the specter of HIV or just an antipathy toward standardized sex play, Frot Culture has taken root and become a distinct and iconoclastic stratum of gay life. Known collectively as the Man2Man Alliance, Frot Men have risen up against the so-called "Butt-Fuck Dictatorship" (a term coined in Bill Weintraub's seminal 2000 Frot manifesto) and champion non-penetrative phallus-to-phallus contact.

Frot Credo stridently deconstructs the Top/Bottom, Active/Passive and Insertion/Reception dichotomies that are viewed as mirrors of heterosexual intercourse; in this ethos, the anus just doesn't fly as a sexual organ and is not the male equivalent of the vagina. It's only through mutual and egalitarian dick-dick meeting that the ultimate co-mingling of two partners' masculinities can be achieved. In Frot World, the buttfuck is merely a parody of straight sex and "gay sex" is not limited to the expected rock 'em sock 'em bouts of all anal action your average DVD jacket promises.

Two gay cocks rubbing

The notion's not without merit and appeal. It's after all the anus that's usually the subliminal cynosure of the Religious Right's condemnation when it comes to same-sex relations. If indeed "a man who lies with a man as with a woman" is truly a transgression, then the cock rub is exempt from the classification; the stimulating of two erect members is an exchange in and of its own right that's not a simple aping of straight sex.

Frot Rhetoric is not without its troubling aspects either, namely in its tendency to reinforce Fundamentalist preoccupations with our sexual orifices serving only the strictest of biological functions. Just as the vagina must only exist as a birth canal, so to is the back door a No Man's Land for sexual gratification.

Suspicions that a latent fear of emasculation lurks behind the Frot Coalition aren't completely unfounded. In one sense, its common themes and allusions to fraternity, innocent horseplay, romance, superheroes and other mythic figures, fidelity, spirituality, male bonding in naturalistic settings, vigor, classical Greek culture and its noble ideas and male primacy (Frot Men will often refer to themselves as "warriors" or "soldiers") are inviting. In another context, the Alliance's linkage of anal play with promiscuity, disease and mental illness can be off-putting.

Assertions that there's an "anal mafia" operating to not only perpetuate a grand-scale lie that anal sex is enjoyable, but also conspiring to discredit Frottage as a sexual disorder come across as deeply paranoid. Hypocritically and condescendingly at times, Man2Man will seek broad-base acceptance and lament its marginalization while hawkishly characterizing anal as nothing more than a vicious means of violating, humiliating and debasing feminized "victims."

Gay Frottage Article

In this Dude Culture, the Power Bottom, the versatile Role Reverser and the new wave of positionally protean Gay Porn Superstars -- not to mention good hygiene and the Male G-spot -- are apparently fantastical concepts along the lines of the centaur and the cockatrice.

Whether this all amounts to a ruggedly individualistic Homosex Movement or a closed-off state of macho separatism (maybe more than a dash of both?) could ultimately be a draw. Gays have simply heard too much bombast about what constitutes a "real" man to not be a little bit cynical about an alliance that draws the line between the Man's Man and the Girly Boy.

Splitting the difference and finding the balanced middle ground is probably the best approach. Strangers With Candy's picaresque little tramp and up-for-anything good time gal Jerri Blank insouciantly said it best: "I like the pole and the hole." It's a compromise the Frot Warriorship seems too unwilling to make.

In the vast ocean of sex, sometimes you ride the wave, sometimes you take the plunge.

©2008 Nightcharm