The best porn movies are the ones that seem like they should be porn parodies.
I also love Randy Spears, who’s handsome, studly, sexy and a huge dork at heart.
February 26, 2011
February 22, 2011
“A tattoo is a permanent reminder of a temporary feeling”. –Jimmy Buffet
Men, Ink.
I’m just gonna say it: it’s intervention time for Gay Porn and its crippling tattoo problem.
Hey, I get it. It’s always fun and new in the beginning. It makes you feel all edgy and hardcore. Then everybody has to get on board, and things start getting more…
…extreme.
Male porn stars start trying to outdo each other like mainstream actresses going under the knife because they can’t stand the chick in front of them having tits that look better in her dress. Pretty soon they start getting creative in order to stand out from the pack, and that can only lead to getting Falcor from The Neverending Story emblazoned on your pelvis or the fucking Necronomicon across your delts.
So guys, I’m locking the door, sitting you down with your nearest and dearest, doing my grave face, and reading you an ultimatum as Martika’s “Toy Soldiers” plays for thematic ambiance.
“Please, please put the needles down. You’re fine just as you are. The needles are bad, bad things. If you continue your reckless behavior, I’ll be forced to sever our relationship. It’s time for you to take the first step in recovering.”
“I’ve made you an appointment for laser removal…” (read the full article)
February 15, 2011
It’s something of an open industry secret now, I assume, but there was a time when it really wasn’t public knowledge:
That contorted, ecstatic, “Take it! Take it all!” reaction shot that men in porn sport when they pop off is almost invariably faked well after the fact.
The man’s pop shot is the money maker in straight porn — wherein the women appear to be improbably climaxing for the entire sex act or not even doing it at all — and just as vital in gay porn, so it’s curious that it’s usually filmed as if it were something of an afterthought. Psychologically, the image of men ejaculating — and then reacting to it in a weird sort of displaced rewind/delay — is prized regardless of the male audience viewing it. Straight men love seeing spurting cocks galore (which is pretty gay), but too often the man attached is just this headless cipher/ersatz stand-in whose investment in the act isn’t all that important.
In gay porn, we want his visceral, teeth-gnashing pleasure evident on his face, which is curious to me, since I imagine that’s what women would prefer in place of all the jizz theatrics they see depicted on screen — not particularly for them but always on them. Certainly they must derive more satisfaction from looking up or down at a man’s face as he climaxes than they do getting sprayed as he thumps his chest in triumph. I mean, I guess. If pornography is any indicator, then straight men and their female partners seem to want a completely different aesthetic in sexual fantasies, while gays by comparison appear to be able to get on a relatively unified page (we’re all jizz whores), engaging in acts women find repellent when performed to them that become suddenly hot when they see two men doing it. (read the full article)
February 11, 2011
Don’t try this at home.
When your average person hears that admonition, they think of the hazards of the latter-day Evel Knievel YouTube generation: teenage skateboarders ending up unwillingly straddling metal railings they fail to clear, borderline personalities with no fear responses leaping from high structures, and devil-may-care d-bags literally playing with fire.
When you write about sex, though, your thoughts immediately turn to the overly-creative, crazy-ass sex positions that directors dream up in fits of inspiration.
In a way I understand the need to push the envelope. There’s so much in the way of porn out there that producers begin to feel the intense need to distinguish their product from the next studio’s. Sometimes porn pairings seem less like couplings than they do the Olympics. See! Talon Cunningham nail a pole vault into co-star Blake Taylor’s waiting ass with a perfect dismount! Half of these guys must be moonlighting with Cirque du Soleil to pull this stuff off without spinal complications.
I wonder: how many injuries are there that arrive in emergency rooms due to aiming too high in the hay? How many occupational hazards in the form of dislocated hips and herniated discs take place on porn sets every day? Does insurance even cover a dick sprain?
So in the interest of the public good, I’ve compiled a list of ten Kama Sutra- (or Zalman King-) inspired positions best left to the professionals: (read the full article)
A moment on the lips!
You get it all in this frothy serving of gay porn confection: Scantily-clad “How else may I serve you, sir?” help! Excessive tats! A stunning array of unintelligible international accents! Oral fixation! Subtitles! Tropical vistas! Longing glances! A blindfold! Even a spilled glass of wine straight out of Valley of The Dolls that serves as the flimsiest of pretexts for soft-focus Eurosex!
Come for the crème brûlée! Stay for the great tits!
January 30, 2011
Everything should be on DVD.
It’s a claim I’ve made many a time in my Myra Breckinridge fits of movie mania. I just can’t abide by any film — no matter how terrible or forgettable — ending up in an oubliette. Every movie is somebody’s favorite flick/personal fantasy made real. Somewhere out there is a lonely soul who will find something to love about the likes of I Know Who Killed Me or Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot!, proving the realm of human dreams is just that vast and accommodating. Just a glance at my DVD shelf will reveal the likes of The Big Doll House, Zardoz, Slave Girls From Beyond Infinity, Caligula, The Garbage Pail Kids Movie, and Deathstalker, so that’s where I’m at emotionally.
Porn is equally valid in my mind because it crystallizes American culture’s sex obsessions in a way that mainstream Hollywood can only hint at. Gay porn in particular — for better or for worse, and lately the latter — parallels where we are socially. It’s actually pretty hilarious to behold, say, the clunky and sore-thumb introduction of condoms into features during the late ’80s, not to mention the development of committed partnerships (“You know you’re my exclusive and cherished lover, babe — now fucking suck my cock.”) in the mid-’90s. Still, what becomes of the movies that slip through the cracks — the forgotten gems that fell out of the technological evolutionary scale when they failed to make it past VHS, got chopped up for inclusion in cheapo B-roll compilations, haunt the private collector gray market, or were lost in the shuffle of corporate porn industry consolidation buy-outs?
Who will save these forgotten castaways from their mist-shrouded isle of unjust banishment? (read the full article)
January 25, 2011
A frankly hilarious (and a little suspect, I think) feature via Marie Claire UK on Reese Rideout’s — who knew? — expert balancing of his gay porn career and a wife at home.
This isn’t the first account we’ve been privy to in which a wife either loves to watch her gay-for-pay better half get plowed, cashes the checks to keep up with the Joneses, or just says “Who the hell cares?” — Jack Wrangler’s rather bemusing hitching to Margaret Whiting was an early much-publicized example — but as just exactly what qualifies as a “real” marriage is being hotly-debated across the country, this kind of arrangement shows how complex and even wacky the true-life side of the American Gothic marital union ultimately is. In a country full of open pairings, swingers, group marriages, fetish enthusiasts, equal opportunity same-sex dabblers, adult film star/sex worker spouses, and plenty of marriages of convenience, it’s clear that the sacred, Biblically-approved definition of marriage is getting harder to hold up as a gold standard. (read the full article)
January 23, 2011
Feeling horny but not quite sure where to go on the expansive web to get your rocks off? No need to worry, there is a little angel — or demon — who will help guide you through the daunting world of internet porn. GayDemon is a website that strives to be the authority on all that is gay internet porn.
What started in 1999 as a link list of creator “B’s” favorite websites, has grown into an expansive and stylish index for the best in gay porn. The site features a directory of more than 30,000 adult websites with almost 1,000 extensive site reviews, all indexed by interest, popularity, and ratings. If that is all too much to take in, the GayDemon Blog, or one of the free image galleries, will give you a daily dose of erotica from one of Demon’s featured sites.
For those porn connoisseurs who prefer the stimulus of a more literary nature, there is a collection of erotic stories submitted by users. No matter who you are or what you’re into, GayDemon will help you find the perfect site to help cure what ails you. You may even find yourself a new fetish! Don’t worry, if you’re not sure what olfactophilia, narratopilia, or peodeiktophilia are, there is a dictionary to help you figure it all out.
Check out GayDemon here and have fun!
January 14, 2011
“I’m tall and almost 230 pounds. I don’t look like I have anything but a big dick compared to someone who’s 5-foot-8-inches. My cock looks larger because it’s on me, but it’s in proportion. I’m tall and thin. I don’t look like I have anything but a big dick standing there. But if you’re only 5-foot-8 with that dick it looks like a monster.”
“I mean, everybody here is 9 to 9 1/2 inches. That’s what they say anyway. It’s bullshit. If you measure it from the asshole, around the back side, then maybe you’re 9 1/2, then everybody is.”
– Rex Chandler, circa 1998
December 26, 2010
…or at least ormolu-varnish?:
“Corbin Fisher is making a public offer to former model Jake Lyons to end months of negotiations and legal wrangling regarding a copyright and trademark infringement case.
The company said it was recently awarded $54,000 by a Florida federal court in the matter but said it would drop all legal action if Lyons donates one tenth of the judgment amount ($5,400) to Equality Florida (EQFL), a St. Petersburg-based non-profit group that is working to help overturn Florida’s ban on gay couples adopting children.
‘It’s important to understand this was never about money,’ Corbin Fisher CEO Jason Gibson said.
The legal battle between Lyons and Corbin Fisher began when Lyons attempted to impersonate the company as a prostitute on an escort site, according to the company.
‘He tried to pass himself off as Corbin Fisher on an escort site,’ Gibson said.
Corbin Fisher stated that it has taken a leadership role in protecting intellectual property rights online and donates significant amounts of money to Equality Florida and Equality California as well as non-profit organizations working on behalf of gay rights and civil rights.
Although the company feels it would not likely recover the total judgment amount from Lyons (whose real name is Justin Krueger, aka ‘Justin Lyons’ and ‘Greg’), it feels he should bear some responsibility for his actions and donate to the gay community.”
Money flowing away from hustlers for the public good? Redistribution of wealth!
